Saturday, May 10, 2008

Don Corleone

While the rest of the world has bad hair days, I just have ghastly 'maid' days!!!
The past week stretched my nerves to a frazzle. First our maid, Shanti, embarks on a socialising spree and vanishes for a week without any prior intimation. This and a chaotic week at work which was further aggravated by sleep deprivation from the kitty rebellion ensured that stress levels were at an all time high.
But, the worst was yet to come. Things came to a head yesterday when our drain pipes clogged and thanks to a remorseful Shanti's over energetic efforts, the stinky stagnant water backed up and flooded the backyard. We did manage to have it cleared and de-clogged last night but even after a good night's rest, I was just a step away from one of my famous meltdowns. And it was at this opportune moment that Ging and DSK decided to give me a gentle shove over the edge.

" Bebs, I think Ging has a boyfriend. She bit me awake at 5 am and I found myself face to face with that huge black and white cat.."
* furrowed forehead*
"Wait a minute...which black and white cat???"
* Is he kidding me??* I know its rude to interrupt but hey, another cat in our bedroom at 5 am is not something alpha moggie discusses calmly across the breakfast table on a Saturday morning!!!
" Yeah, you know that white one with black ears and tail who sits on our back wall"
" That loafer!!!...He came in??? And Ging didn't chase him away???..I don't believe this..What was he doing in the bedroom??"
* Voice goes up several notches, fast approaching annoying shrillness* *B.P. soars* I look around for the recalcitrant kitty, but she is nowhere to be seen.
" well, he was shouting at me with a pleading expression as if to say please let me also in"
" Let him in???...That dumb local mafioso..No way!!!....he's a regular Don Corleone without the charms of either Marlon Brando or Al Pacino!!!..What on earth is wrong with Ging?..."
Visions of mob moll Ging, replete in bling, dark glasses and a blond wig, float before my eyes...
Those of you who think I am overreacting or being the paranoid mommy, let me tell you, Don C is fat, mean and has the scariest yellow eyes I have ever seen on a cat. Plus he is rude!!!...Believe you me people, he is definitely not one of those cute cuddly kitties a girl should be bringing home to meet her parents.
But apparently, Ging and Don C have done a good job of brainwashing Dsk.
" Bebs, the mafia in Sicily were not considered as criminals but were considered protectors and men of honour...people looked up to them"
" Well, that was in Sicily - a lawless land by any standards...No wonder they lost the world war...Our Don Corleone is no cat of honour...I mean, I see him every day glowering at me from our backyard wall or hurling kitty abuses at me from above my kitchen ledge!!!...I tell you, he has his paw in every nefarious kitty activity in this neighbourhood....And worse, he actually steals Ging's kibble..I mean what kind of a cat would do that to his lady love?"
" Besides, just think of their babies...he is a wanna be 'Van' and she is a tabby...their kids probably will be a riot of colours and horrendous if they have his mean looks'...
" Ging can take care of herself and besides, I don't think she has given us much of a choice...she likes him..period.. we just have to live with it as long as it lasts"
From the corner of my eye, I spy Ging sneaking in and a smug Don C at his post on our wall.
* scowl* " Don C is not coming in here...And that is that"
" But he already does...he is in the house every time you turn your back....just because u don't see him, doesn't mean that he is not here...so live with it, bebs"
With that the doting daddy burrows back into the newspaper signalling the end of the conversation. With Ging and dsk ranged on one side, clearly all my efforts to keep Don C out are going to be futile.
Seriously, what is it with these fathers and their daughters?
I clatter and bang the breakfast dishes as I clear the table...Just so that they know I am mad, but neither moggie bats an eyelid.
Perhaps, I should adopt Don C & give them a taste of their own medicine!!!

2 comments:

SATHEESH said...

Awesome..........

Roopa said...

ha ha..the moggie household is adding more members!!! hope you don't get alienated there, alpha moggie :D

you have a real tickling sense of humor :)